How to become a better person
Knowledge may seem as a small part on how to become better but at the same time it’s one of the biggest role on becoming better. It might be easy for your parents or your friends to tell you to stop doing anything negative to yourself and society. But they’re just words alone, because using your knowledge you can enable yourself to strive to become better. Rather than just following orders without motivation or so we can say brainwashing. Brainwashing yourself may seem a very scary idea, but if you’re doing for the better of the society and yourself. I can conclude that it is the best idea for us all. These are the list of knowledge you need before starting to enable yourself to become a better person.
1) Know yourself
- Your personality
- Your goal
- Your motivation
- Your mindset
2) Know your limit
- Your weakness
- Your skills
- Your talent
3) Understand others
- Your friends, relatives and lover
- Your Self- Awareness
4) Society, Earth and Yourself
- Give and Help others
- World Resource and Morals
- Be Balance
- Be humble
- Get to Know Your Personality
- Understanding your own personality is the first key. You have the collective opinion of others which is one aspect.
- You also have your own database of information about what your personality is really like, and who you are in your private moments as well as in your public ones.
- The idea is to get to know your personality inside out, to know what you are and what you are not like. Understand what makes you react a certain way in life’s myriad of situations. Ask yourself “Why did I do that?” and answer it.
- Who are you behind your name? What are your characteristic traits? Who are you among friends? What about strangers? What persona do you portray to the outside world?
- What are you really like on a good day as well as a bad day, in face of a challenge or a great reward? How do you react to the world around you?
- Get to Know your Dreams
- Your dreams and hopes create the pathway into your future. They help you build the life you can be proud of living.
- Your dreams matter. Your dreams are important. Your dreams are worth going after. Don’t believe anything less.
- And start getting to know your dreams well. Get to know the details and the specifics.
- If you want to become a musician, ask yourself: What instrument do you want to play? What level of proficiency do you want to learn? How big a part of your life would it be? And on and on until you know everything about your dream.
- Make your dreams part of your daily pursuits. Take them seriously. Work at them. Glorify them instead of hiding them and being ashamed of them.
- Get to know your Motivation
- Motivation pushes us to achieve our goals, feel more fulfilled and improve overall quality of life.
- Know Your Strengths and Weaknesses. Work on ironing out your weaknesses and building on your strengths.
- Help others. Share your ideas and help friends get motivated. Seeing others do well will motivate you to do the same. Write about your success and get feedback from readers.
- Stay Positive. See the good in bad. When encountering obstacles, you want to be in the habit of finding what works to get over them.
- Do it. Try not to procrastinate, assess the risks but keep working towards your goals.
- Get to know you Mindset
- Listen to What Others Say. We may like to tell ourselves that we are positive people, but it’s not always true. Listen to what your friends say about your attitude. They may say things that you don’t want to hear, but sometimes the best changes in life come from constructive criticism.
- Appreciate the Things You Have. Look around you and learn to appreciate everything you have in your life. Your family, friends, career, home, food, car, etc., is enough to create a positive attitude because no matter how bad things get in life, we still must be thankful for everything we still have. Put things into perspective, and enjoy the good things in your life.
- Think Twice before you Act Once. Look at problems logically. When you let emotion take over, you act, think about what your actions will cause. If a person does something wrong that negatively affects you, don’t attack. Think about the best response. Only after you have done this twice should you take action.
- Don’t Join the Gossip. Don’t join on the negative conversations around you. If you see a conversation heading towards that road, excuse yourself politely and leave.
- Focus in on interesting ideas or concepts in every class you attend. Be prepared to “enjoy” your studies. Do not accept the work as drudgery or painful. Make it joyful by looking for a positive aspect.
- Know your limit
To know your limit isn’t simple, you have to test your maximum in everything in order to know where you will last. It sometimes just comes by like your anger limit, you will know when you get angry. Anger and skills are the main problem in this chapter of our guideline.
A) Your weakness
First of all, you have to know your weakness, when you know your weakness, then you will know where is your limit. By doing this, you can dodge your weakness by finding more several ways to counter your weaknesses. Every man’s weakness is anger, whether you’re patience or not, once you snap it’s all over. So remember to constantly remind yourself to keep your cool and stop being angry. Always listen to others advice, some may be helpful and some maybe not. So compare their advices and take the helpful ones and throw away those which aren’t. The best advice to overcome your weaknesses is to be confident and never give up hope until the end. It is better to fight on and not give in.
B) Your skills and talents
Know your skills and talents beforehand, talents are hard to be found, you have to explore both the world and yourself more in order to find it. Your skills however is already known by you, but the only question is how to use it? But first let’s talk about your talents, to find your talent. You have to do things that you don’t want to, it is a very hypocritical advice to say but you might find your talent in things you hate to do. Otherwise you can also practice and gain more knowledge from every different things you can find. Remember, skills and exploration is fine, but always remember to avoid bad influence and absorb good ones. Basically, educate yourself with more different good skills.
To become a better person in both social and education, the best and easiest advice is to understand yourself and hard-work. Your social skills comes from humor, knowledge, skill and you. It is something important for communication for people around you. Becoming a better person not only requires your moral to change, it also requires how much you’re willing to gain. Gaining enough knowledge and skills for some particular people and group is the best, mainly they’re humor. Hard work is the most simplest thing for any other man’s education and knowledge. But when I say hard work does not necessary means it is everything, you have to find the most efficient way to do it. Efficiency and production is the most important key for your improvement. Just like the saying “If wealth was the inevitable result of hard work and enterprise, every woman in Africa would be a millionaire” quote by George Monbiot.
- Understand Others
It never had been easy to understand others, it is hard at first. But with practices, it will become better and easier to understand another. Understanding others requires your effort and how wise are you. It requires your sacrifice and time to define and empathize with one and another. You have to be self aware that you’ve no right to jump into conclusion beforehand. This is where you put on their shoes and gain trust from them.
A) Self- Awareness
You have to be aware of yourself to not do anything that will provoke hate toward others. It’s never nice to gain more enemies than friends. The very first point is to stop blaming others, it always comes by where you’re not aware that you’re blaming another person. You will simply not be conscious of it, try to control and start to practice your empathy towards others. Remember to always show your politeness, respect and appreciation towards others. It is a practice where you will start getting use to it and you will change for both a better person and image for others to see. Always remember to give gifts to people special to you, surprise them and don’t show up empty ended. It will improve your relationship with one and another. Besides, remember to always thank people who help along the way, it’s always nice to hear a thank you.
In other words, you have to become another person. You have to evolve yourself with the mindset to be willing to change. You have to become kind and compassionate, so you will receive the same treatment from others. You have to let go of your resilience and not dwell in them. Have integrity in yourself and show others that you do care about them. It was never easy and it will never be. As said we’re not perfect, but we can always strive to be better.
B) Your Relatives, Friends and Lover
On the other hand, your relatives, friends and lover are people who is special to you. It’s either keep them or lose them. You have to sympathize them and better empathize them when they are on their downfall. Listen to their opinions and their words, you will be able to understand their views and their shoes. It might be a crazy idea to go against someone’s view or opinions, but if you truly are their friend, relative or lover. You will constantly be honest with them and be direct about your views and opinions. It’s how true bond comes, you don’t lie to get better relationship, you tell the truth so they will tell you theirs. Truth might hurt them, so remember to give an open heart when they criticize your opinion. Give them time and they will understand what you meant, they will know that you’re trying to help them.
Forgiveness, it’s a hard decision to agree on, especially if it was a certain someone who hurt you badly. But what is harder is apology, it’s a very embarrassing and humiliating idea to agree on. I advice everyone to forgive anyone who apologized, let go of your defensiveness towards them and give an open heart to others.
Because hate and anger will continue to grow if you don’t forgive, just like Buddha quoted that “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” So forgive and let go of resentments on others.
Remember that your relatives is your family and your friends is your second family. You spend a lot of time with both families, they are very precious to you. Time is a priceless commodity, something you cannot buy back. You have to be loyal and honest to them. You spent your time with them and you do not want to lose them all in one go. Be respectful to them, especially your parents. They are the one who made you, even if you despise them or how much they abused you. At the end of the day, without them, you won’t be here reading or listening to this. Learn to love everyone and accept everyone.
Lastly, your lover, they are your love and they are very important. They might be the person you spend your next decades with them. Love takes sacrifice, you don’t just love someone because they love you back. You have to sacrifice yourself for them, both sides have to sacrifice themselves in order to support each other. Lovers have to practice their acceptance towards each other, if you can accept their pretty side, you have to accept their ugly side too. It’s simply a balance and better understanding with trust towards each other. Always be honest to each other, never drop a single lie at all. Make a loop of love and truth in your house, don’t ever lie to one and another. The most important of them all is to be loyal and honest to your soul mate.
- Society, Earth & Yourself
Society ,earth and yourself may seem a little out of topic on how to become a better person. But the role here is “practices” on how to become a better person. Here on out is to do stuff for others and it might as well play a role to change your heart and your mindset towards other people. It’s a frequent practice that will actually soften your heart for others in need. Because to change into a better person, you have to start from the inside. Which is your heart.
You should start to help others when you’re trying to become a better person, it is part of the practices. For simple practices that will soften yourself up is to stop wasting water, be helpful and recycle your recyclables even if they’re not yours. These are simple tricks and ways, it will not only turn you but people around you to follow your examples. To become more extreme, you can start lend a helping hand to people in need. Such as homeless people and sick people. You can visit orphanage and old people to talk to them and help them. Another way is to own pets or adopt one, that will simply soften your heart and understand others. There is a lot to do, so I would really advise if you are a busy person, you can just do simple things such as supporting your local restaurants or shops.
There is some people who despise doing these stuff for others such as giving. Because they think their needs and importance comes first. Mainly these happens are from greed and money. So I want to tell everyone that you should constantly remind yourself that money isn’t everything.
Because “if you think money is everything, you will start doing everything for money” by Voltaire.
You will not see love anymore, as you’re blinded by money. The best advice is to start giving, explore the true happiness from the love of many in need. Give and acknowledge others instead of criticizing them. It is a much better way for you to become a better person. Both in society and yourself.
Philosophy is part of the argument to understand your standing and why you should change and a guideline to not fall off the edge. The definition of philosophy is the study of fundamental nature of knowledge, reality, existence, value, nature, causes and meaning of life especially when considered as an academic discipline. It’s where you have the sense and logical explanation on why you should become a better person.
In other words, humans are basically ignorant and arrogant at the same time. We can easily spot another man’s mistake but not of our own and we don’t easily see another person’s good deeds. This is mainly because we put values in ourselves and we stand up with pride. This is what enables us to become overconfident. But at the same time, there is a few individuals who lives in isolation and anger. They always overwork themselves and end up being proud of what they have gone through. My point and conclusion for this is to never overdone or underdone anything, whether it is a positive or negative thing. For example, if you’re trying to build up your triceps and you can only do 20 push-ups a day, you should only do 20 push-ups a day, you shouldn’t train over 20 push-ups every day. Because it will overstress your body. Only when time passes you will only then exceed your limitation throughout your 20 reps a day. That same goes to every other disciplines, you will stress your mental health when you overdo your studies or even becoming a better person and that’s exactly what I said from the beginning, people overstress their mental health and end up becoming proud, ignorant and arrogant towards others. Exceeding your limit takes time and patience, you shouldn’t overdo or underdone anything. Otherwise you will lose your self-awareness and most likely your other skills. Even our guidelines to make you become a better person does not necessary means that you have to overdo it.
There was a saying by Bill Gates that “Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can’t lose”. That is the indication into pride, arrogance and ignorance towards others. You will isolate yourself when you success or win over others, if you don’t watch out. That same goes with he parable of “The Pharisee and the Tax Collector” from Luke chapter 18 verse 9-14. Long story short, The Pharisee was proud of himself because he is a rightful man. But then the tax collector humbled himself and said he is a sinner. Then Jesus said “For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted”. There is also a quote saying “humility is what makes us angels, pride is what make us devils” by Saint Augustine.
Being humble is what makes us stronger and being proud is what makes us weaker. That is why we made this guideline to become a better person, to not be consumed by our own pride. That is our philosophy.
Brock, F. (2015, April 28). the-greatest-discovery-of-all-getting-to-know-yourself/. Retrieved from Prolific Living: http://www.prolificliving.com/the-greatest-discovery-of-all-getting-to-know-yourself/
CHILDS, C. (n.d.). 8-steps-to-continuous-self-motivation. Retrieved May 14, 2015, from lifehack: http://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/8-steps-to-continuous-self-motivation.html
Ferris. (n.d.). positive-mindset. Retrieved May 14, 2015, from Ferris State University: http://www.ferris.edu/colleges/university/eccc/positive-mindset.htm